Spherx's Domain

As we speak, one movie is capturing the world’s imagination and breaking box office records. Based on how much money it’s accumulated and general word of mouth, it seems like everyone has seen Avatar. Everyone except me.

When I saw the first trailer I wasn’t impressed. Maybe I’ve seen so many movies with so much good and bad CGI, that I can’t recognize anything special anymore. So I just resolved to see it at some point. But as weeks passed and more eyewitness accounts rolled in, I became even less interested. Patches saw it and his review was a simple “meh”. He, like most people, enjoyed the visuals but felt it lacked a compelling story. How is something that’s basically Dances With Wolves no longer a compelling story? It may be in the details of the writing, which creatively refers to the mineral being sought after on Pandora as ‘unobtainium’.

“But Spherx, you haven’t seen it in 3D! You have to see it ‘the right way’! In IMAX! In 3D!” No wonder it’s earning so much money! That’s like a $15 ticket here! It could even be $20 in other markets! And now I’m wondering if when people claim they’re so amazed by the visuals, is it possibly because this is the first time they’ve seen a modern 3D film?

I’d already seen Coraline and Up in today’s 3D and felt it to be quite remarkable. So far, mostly CGI kids films have been used to sell 3D entertainment leaving most adults unware of the experience. So is it possible that Avatar in 3D only sounds revolutionary because a new and more vocal audience has been exposed to the new 3D?

So while I wait for a convincing argument, I’m gonna pass on Avatar until DVD when a few short years from now the backlash will come, the hype will wear off, and Avatar may turn out to be the mediocre movie I imagine it to be.

Most people unwind on Saturday night, so we took the night off and went out to see the newly released Youth In Revolt. If you’re looking to laugh this weekend, I recommend choosing it as your source for comedy. Idiot Chittix and Patches came along too and afterword we wrote our review for it, as well as published a long overdue review for the Friday the 13th remake from last year.

Mac, Quiphen, IC and I sat down to talk about Wes Anderson’s adaptation of Fantastic Mr. Fox. That conversation can be foxed out here.

Went to see Sherlock Holmes and Up In The Air on Christmas Day and we’ve got our subsequent reviews posted. You don’t have to be a detective to know they’re really funny. So check them both out!

Hey everybody, I’ve been taking the time to update our review section. We now have completed reviews for Adventureland, 500 Days of Summer, Moon, Bronson, I Love You Man, Watchmen, Coraline, Waltz With Bashir, and Sunshine Cleaning. Check them out won’t you? More to come!

Thanksgiving morning, my dad broke into my lair to inquire as to whether or not I would like to take my sister to see a movie

“Does she want to see a movie?” I asked.

“I don’t know, but I thought you might want to.” he replied, and then left. A few minutes later, my sister came down with a list of movies she wanted to see.

“Have you seen Boondock Saints II yet?” she asked. “Uuuuuummm, no?” I lied.

“You have, haven’t you? Okay well… hmm…”

“What else you got on your list?” I asked.

“Well… New Moon…” she whispered. “Yeah, I’ll gladly see Boondock Saints again for a third time if I don’t have to watch New Moon.” I proclaimed, but I could tell she was wanting to choose New Moon instead.

“I’ve got other choices… but I kinda wanted to see them with Ryan.” she added. Being the gracious brother that I am, I conceded, “Well, I guess since mom and dad are paying I can put up with seeing New Moon – but we have to dress up and pretend to be uber-Twilight fans!”

Kelly laughed. “I’ll dress up like a vampire and you have to look like the girl in it!” She was totally down with the idea and raced upstairs to get ready while I found my old Joker makeup and used it redden my eyes and pale my skin even more than it already is. I wanted to go get some fangs but Kelly reminded me that since it was Thanksgiving, any costume shops were probably closed. So I passed on the fangs but took her copy of the book with us “to make sure that the movie is accurate.”

On the way to the theatre, we stopped at Wal-Mart to buy some glitter that I applied to my skin so that I could sparkle in the sun. It was so lame… but also SO brilliant! I soon found out Tara was joining us for the movie and wondered then why I needed to go in the first place. But since I’d already committed to the role, I had to see it through. I was also baffled because Tara had said she HATED the first movie. And when we arrived, Tara thought our costumes were pretty funny while the concessions people were a bit disturbed by us.

Finally, we took our seats and soon I began to suffer for over two and a half hours. This Twilight stuff was even more boring and dumb than I first imagined. Five minutes in, I looked at Tara and my sis and asked how much longer the movie was. How little girls find this romantic is beyond me. The Edward character basically dumps the girl (who I assume he spent the previous movie winning over) because he loves her so much he doesn’t want his vampireness to hurt her. Of course, the young, dumb girl doesn’t understand this concept (and still doesn’t by the end), so to fill her broken heart she teases some new boy and gives him blue balls until he does the same thing to her that Edward did. And when that guy finally reveals he’s a werewolf, Bella eventually realizes she still wants Edward and ditches werewolf boy to go to Europe (in less than a day) and stop vampire boy from killing himself because some premonition his sister had made him think Bella drowned herself…

I didn’t lose you did I? Fucking lame, right? But at least now when I make fun of Twilight, I know what the fuck I’m talking about and not hating for the sake of hating. Kelly and Tara insist it’s the movies that are crap but the books are good…

I find that hard to believe.

And unfortunately, the audience turnout was minimal today, so I didn’t weird out as many people as I’d hoped. I usually stay all the way through the credits, but we were gone as quick as possible and returned home where I promptly shed my vampire disguise and returned to working on videos.